Jealousy

I put my hands up to the bowls of these glasses.
They clink together clumsily.
My fingers slide to their stems
Which are now longer than my arms.

I keep talking.
Because I can.
Because it's all that I can do.

You sit at my table
And won't eat my food.
You are withholding.
(Aren't we all?)

Competitiveness arrives and is ravenous.
So am I.
What I cannot eat sits out of reach.
I want more.

I walk down the stairs
(My heart is suicidal)
Into the best hug I've had in ten years.

My God, I am starving!
I wish my life would end right now
While I am shocked by comfort.

I do not think you know
How I am sheltered here.
(In a few more seconds I'll let you go.)

Go.
Just go.
Go home now.

Go withhold somewhere else,
With someone else,
Who'll count herself lucky
Until she sees the feast is not for her.

No one will eat.

Or at least
That's how I'll tell it.

I Climb This Tree at Night

I climb this tree at night

One foot after nother
Until, in this crook, I lean my weight
All the weight of my broken heart

I lean my face
Here
And move my hand
On this slender curving smooth
(Until it pushes back with all its might)

Oh, stop
This is not what I wanted
Not where I wanted to be
But

When I look up
Darkness kisses my face
And stars press peace down
Upon my open eyes.

It's all right.
It's all right.
Nothing is lost.
And God is still kind.